Christmas Day

Harry Stadling (Brandon Maggert) is obsessed with Christmas! In fact he wants to “be” the authentic Santa Claus with a real suit sleigh and reindeer. Ever since he learned the truth about Santa he s tried to make Christmas a reality. Growing up a toy maker Harry is met with naysayers and critics who mock him for his yuletide beliefs but he wants people to get the presents they deserve even if that means giving the gift of murder! Cynics and uptight hypocrites beware! Lewis Jackson’s classic black comedy horror film CHRISTMAS EVIL (aka YOU BETTER WATCH OUT!) is according to cult film director/auteur John Waters the best seasonal film of all time. I wish I had kids. I d make them watch it every year and if they didn t like it they d be punished! Time to hang those stockings from the fireplace and get ready the sadistic holiday chestnut CHRISTMAS EVIL is here in an all-new Director s Cut edition. Transferred from the director s own personal film elements this version of CHRISTMAS EVIL is the original first cut of the film containing even more scenes and never-before-seen footage!Extras:New Widescreen (1.78:1) Transfer from the Original Vault MaterialsAudio Commentary from Director LEWIS JACKSONBonus Audio Commentary by Director Lewis Jackson and Cult Director JOHN WATERS!Director s Cut Version Featuring Never-Before-Seen Footage!StoryboardsFormat: DVD MOVIE Genre: HORROR UPC: 654930306093 Manufacturer No: SFD0060

• Santa’s Slay
• Silent Night, Deadly Night
• Slaughter High (The Lost Collection)
• The Burning
• Happy Birthday to Me

This year when the holidays rolled around, we, Sid the Elf, tossed around the idea of reviewing a Christmas B. There was only one question: Which one of the many Christmas B horror flicks would we select? The obvious choice here is probably Silent Night, Deadly Night. But, Christmas Evil was too good to pass up when it was coupled with A Drifters Christmas in The Bizare Christmas Combo for less than 10 bucks. Going in, we had almost no expectations of this film. Were we disappointed, thrilled, confused, or wildly ammused? Yes, yes, yes, and absolutely.

The first event in this film is a positively creepy Jackie Gleason-esque sequence in which Harry (our main character) witnesses his mother being given the business by Santa Claus(Harry’s dad in costume). This tramatauzing experiance gives us the premise for the movie. We flash-forward to 33 years later. Harry now has a crap job at the fledgling Jolly Dreams toy factory. He has decided to become something of a real-life Santa Claus, sleeping in a Santa suit and decorating his apartment with an obscene ammount of Christmas paraphernalia. As if this wasn’t strange enough, Harry also spies on neighborhood kids and jots their names down in his “Good” and “Bad” kids books. One of the many many bright spots of the film happens here when Harry catches one of the kids thumbing through a Penthouse Fairytales From the Darkside-style. The following day, Harry calls his brother to cancel Christmas Eve dinner because he has “plans.”

Aparently, Harry’s plans were to steal toys from his company and bring them to a Children’s Hospital. Then, he went to the house of the kid with the Penthouse and dropped off a bag of dirt as a Christmas present. Did this teach the kid a lesson? Probably not. If he wanted to deter the kid from porn he should have dipped into the real Santa’s stash and given the kid any one of a number of disturbing selections. Obeese Grandmas with stretchmarks vol. 4 perhaps. Anyway, next Harry is heckled by some people outside of a local church so he offs them. He also gets into the house of a naughty co-worker who skipped out on work to get loaded and iced him. Sid wouldn’t last a week working with Harry. After a bizare sequence, Harry ends up getting chased by an old-school mob. These guys had torches and everything, and they all looked like relatives of Mike Pipper but Harry manages to escape them and makes his way to his brother’s house. Harry’s brother now realizes that Harry is the Santa-clad killer, chokes him out and stuffs him in the front seat of Harry’s van. Harry then comes to and clocks his brother and starts to drive away. During Harry’s getaway, the mob catches up with him and forces his van off a bridge. But, harry goes into a delusional state at the exact moment his van is flying off the bridge. To him, the van turns into a van/Santa’s sleigh and is heading for the sky eventhough it is actually still a van and plunging Harry to his death. If you don’t think this whole section wasn’t hilarious, well Sid doesn’t know what to tell you.

We couldn’t have been more pleased with this film. We spent a solid 30 minutes of the film debating who Harry looked like which is always entertaining. The rest of our viewing was split between eating, basking in the glorious B of this flick(making fun of how bad it was), and pointing out how this movie was a definite stoner flick. To the others that have seen this movie: Think about it. The part when Harry was on the street with the lights, all his delusions, and the quick camera cuts and extreme close-ups are all signs pointing in that direction. We also fell in love with this movie when we noticed that they used a white blanket in lieu of fake snow. You can’t put a price on that kind of B. So if you’re in the mood for a nice Christmas flick and don’t feel like going the route of George Bailey or Jacob Marley, try out Harry Stadling, played by Fiona Apple’s dad–seriously.

Where to buy cheap prices? -Christmas Evil $14.02



*** Product Information and Prices Stored: Dec 29, 2009 22:29:06